Boooooooo! The football fan's dissent

After another Sunday of football, a Super Sunday if you believe Sky, those who make a living and a hobby of being on Twitter talk about issues off the pitch rather than what happened (or not) on the pitch. Arsenal visited Stoke City, and the usual pre-match debated raged about the clash of styles, and remembering some of the battles of recent seasons.

The most infamous was in 2010 where Ryan Shawcross broke the leg of Aaron Ramsey in a brutal challenge, and many of the other matches between the two clubs have seen several questionable fouls. Ramsey eventually returned to the first team, and every match between the two clubs sees the predictable booing by the Stoke fans, directed at Ramsey. Now without showing the photo of the incident, it's fairly safe to say that Ramsey could never be accused of making a meal of the injury, and it could be argued that he hasn't quite reached the same levels since.

 Finally, the caveman is captured on film

Similarly, Sunday's match between the two sides has ended up in the same fashion. Ramsey came on as a second half substitute, while the Stoke fans have reverted to type.

But it's part of a more recently talked about subject, that of the conduct of fans on the terraces. Would Tony Pulis not prefer his team's fans to cheer for his team, to encourage, rather than focus their attention against a player whose career almost ended because of a challenge from his captain? He may well not be that sort of player, but it's becoming an annual tradition.

Another fan habit in the firing line is booing your own team. Of course it's not a new thing, but the Twitterati and bloggers generally disagree with the well-worn concept of 'you pay your money, you can do what you want'. But as above, would it not be more productive to support the team through bad spells? There are plenty of ways to vent anger, be it not buying club merchandise or protests outside the ground. Or wearing Kean Out earrings like a previous blog...

Blackburn fans weren't happy with Venky's

But there are other reasons to boo - the former player returning is a favourite, as it the star player of an opponent, or it may even be an attempt to placate someone (Springfield residents saying Booo-urns to Monty Burns). But be careful, you may end up booing your future darling...

Chelsea fans try to seduce Fernando Torres

PS This blog wasn't intended as a huge dig at Stoke... Maybe I should have concentrated on the blog rather than digging at someone else?

The best goalkeeper shirts of all time

Back in June, our friends at The Football Shirt Collective posted my list of five of the worst goalkeeper shirts ever, and it ended up showcasing a 1990s revival of horror. Well it would only be fair to show my five favourites, and a little blurb to accompany... As usual, I welcome suggestions below the line!

Arsenal 1989

First photo courtesy of Peter Rapley

The template in Adidas's UK heyday in the late 1980s, this shirt was simple and classic, green with white stripes and collar. Recently recreated in 2009 for Liverpool and Real Madrid, but this was the classic. As John Lukic shows, there was a strange discrepancy where the Adidas logo and club badge were at different angles. I owned a replica in 1989, and since then have never known why! Would welcome an answer...

Italy 1982/2012

 Zoff in 1982                                         Buffon in 2012

The oldest and newest shirts on the list, these interpretation on the same designs score well. Simples design, well contrasting colours, and the 1982 vintage will be memorable for Dino Zoff lifting the World Cup. Recreated for the summer's European Championships, and almost with a similar outcome. Fortunately for some, Sports Direct are selling the 2012 version for a knockdown price as they seem to think it's a training top!

England 1986

 Being beaten by the Hand Of Cheating Bastard in Mexico

Another silver and blue effort, another World Cup. Unfortunately this one was immortalised for the wrong reasons, as England's record cap holder was beaten by a handball and then one of the greatest goals ever in 1986. The shirt was simple, but another example of a different replica, as Umbro went through a phase of using a different logo for goalkeeper shirts, with a No.1 next to the logo. Strange. But nice use of padding on the shoulders, clearly inspired by Dynasty.

Man City 2009

 Shirt comes complete with "Done By Pirlo Panenka" label

Props to Umbro here - the brand were re-inventing themselves with the Tailored By range, simple designs and going back to classics. Here we have Manchester City's effort, sported by Shay Given and Joe Hart. Green with white trim, top marks. Just a shame about the sponsor, but that is a moan for another day...

Real Madrid 2010

 Real were trying to become more popular in Liverpool

A slightly strange choice, the thought of goalkeepers in red is still something of a novelty. In 2010, Real Madrid used red for their second choice keeper shirt, yet it must have been popular, as the following season saw almost exactly the same kit become the away colours for the outfield kit. Looking like mid 80s Liverpool is one thing, but the sense of entitlement remains.

The Good (Football) Pub Guide

Much has been made, especially by this site, about the superstitions and rituals around going to football matches. Lucky pants, getting certain trains, buying the same sweets before each game. But for the more grown up amongst us (I don't think too many young ragamuffins are logging on to read this), it's all about the pub.

Much like the episode of Men Behaving Badly where Gary and Tony had to review various hostelries before plumping for the renovated version of their favourite anyway, the football pub is like a cathedral, where football fans go to drink with other football fans, to chat about the game as they see it over a pint of watered-down gnat's piss in a plastic glass.

The pioneers of the Good Pub Guide

There are several key categories you need to consider when choosing the pub, some of which we shall review below. I shamelessly admit to using the pub I normally drink in before games as a template, and it may be some sort of omerta to mention some parts of the pre-match ritual, it's all about being objective. I also appreciate that I'm using Saturday at 3pm as the standard kick-off, which doesn't happen all that often.

Selection of drinks

Most football fans are pretty gullible. There, I've said it. We'll drink what's on offer, usually because it's the only thing there. That's why the bars inside grounds make a killing, because they sign exclusive contracts with suppliers, to sell only one beer (usually Carlsberg). However, most self-respecting people would rather set fire to themselves than drink that swill, so that could be the deciding reason they drink elsewhere. Forgetting that licensing rules almost always stipulate supplying your beer in a plastic glass, what else is there? You can still get your beer in glass bottles, and it's safe to say more people get bottled than glassed. Is the beer watered-down? Do you get to choose between the lagers of the globe, or merely Fosters and a questionable wife-beating alternative? Some pubs will score highly on this round by virtue of selling perhaps an exotic Spanish lager on draft, served by dusty lovelies who may or may not be relatives of the owner. But it's more than that…

 They have a wide selection

Entertainment

Once you've had your fry-up in the local greasy spoon, you need a cold pint of something to wash it down with. You arrive early, the pub doors are open, and Soccer AM or Sky Sports News is on the big screen. Sorted. But then… The novelty band who were funny a few years ago take to the stage, clouds of dry ice rise, and the braying morons who still buy their CDs and follow them on Twitter scream with delirium. The TV goes off. The songs begin about the former left back who uses Nokia phones, and singing about having a can of Red Stripe for me breakfast. Big minus points. The pub has invested in big screens, why not use them? In the days of smartphones, people want information, and the stream of numbers at the bottom of Soccer Saturday will keep them there, and keep them spending. Don't get delusions of grandeur. Don't rest on your laurels. Keep Pointless for the weekday evenings at home, stick it on 405 with the sound up.

 The bar is in 3D!

Clientele

Are you fluent in Finnish? Do you wear strange hats, fake replica shirts and tight jeans? Then you may fit in with the day tripper, the ones who spend hundreds in the club shop, then jinx your team by unveiling their new away shirt with 'Champions' on the back, while your team are top on goal difference and in bad form. They take photographs of the photographs on the wall. They play Europop on the jukebox. They'll strike up a conversation with your mate about how much they too love Dortmund, and you'll be stuck with them for the rest of the day. You need to just ignore it, and try and fight your way past them to get to the bar while they order a pina colada with a slim panatella. Put yourself in their odd shoes. If your team gets drawn away in Europe to a Nordic team, you'll be the ones at the bar in clothing that isn't suitable for the weather, moaning about spending £9 on a half pint of the local ale. They're the fans your club wants. You need to accept them, or find a new pub.

 Not normally included, these women

Toilets

Not many blokes worry about the facilities in the toilet. If there's a hole in the floor, it'll do. It's a bonus to not have to aim around the rapscallions snorting Columbia's finest off the cisterns. You know you're somewhere posh if the swamp has an attendant (don't do a Cheryl Cole and hit them, it's bad for your career, honest), screaming "no spray, no lay" while aiming half a can of Lynx Africa at the back of your head. The sophisticated venue will have the commentary of the lunchtime kick-off piped into the gents, allowing you to take your time and actually wash your hands. The average venue will have a towel in a puddle on the floor, assorted grafitti on the walls relating to previous visiting clubs, and a young child holding dearly onto their dad's hands, wondering if this really is the glamour end of the game. You're not in Kansas now Toto.

 Stare silently ahead

Charitable donations

Once you're in the football pub, you're part of a captive audience. You've suffered a 45 minute wait at the bar, sweating like Gary Glitter in PC World with the lack of air conditioning, and you are surely next in line for that stool when the pregnant woman moves… So in comes the slightly simple looking chap holding the replica trophy of a competition you've never won, offering photographs with it in return for a donation to a charity you've never heard of. Funny how that bloke always has a new Rolex and new shoes… There is also the tin-rattler, collecting for "the children, won't somebody please think of the children". Never mind that the ID around her neck refers to the local video library, she is clearly keen to save many lives, while fleecing the merry men of the local boozer. When challenged about her quest, she'll run off at pace that would impress Usain Bolt, or just pat you on the head and give you a sticker. Either way, you need to tolerate being a sucker to keep drinking in your boozer of choice.

 Save the clock tower!

So there you go. You're armed with the main categories you'll need to consider before you choose your pub for the new football season. Just remember - there's always somewhere better. You just haven't the bottle to find it. Yet...

Traditional curtain raiser... Community shield classics

Cliche alert! It's that time of year again. A week before the English top flight starts again, we remember the successes of last season. This year's Community Shield (or Charity Shield if you're that way inclined) features a slight change, being hosted at Villa Park due to the Olympic football tournament. The large shield trophy tends to count for little in the honours lists, unless the 2001 Liverpool side are involved...

The clash between the Champions and the FA Cup winners will features Manchester City and Chelsea, and although it is essentially a friendly, both teams will want to win. Chelsea have had a poor pre-season, despite the many millions spent on improving their midfield, while City have yet to spend big and have largely the same squad that so dramatically won them the title.

2011 winners Manchester United

For this post, I've listed three of the more memorable Charity Shield clashes, which is getting harder with some rather insipid showings in recent years. There isn't much by way of science or reason for the selection, so forgive any glaring omissions, any suggestions below the line are welcomed!

1974 - Liverpool v Leeds United

Famous for two reasons. One immortalised in book and cinema, and one for a hilarious display of machismo. The match was the first of the reign of Brian Clough, starting his 44 days in charge of the club. After a well publicised rivalry with Leeds while managing Derby, Clough took over after Don Revie's departure to manage England. Fact mixed with fiction as a result of The Damned United, by David Peace. It's safe to say that Clough's reign was short, and this match did little to help Clough try to turn the Champions into a free-flowing side.

The second reason was for a coming together between Kevin Keegan and Billy Bremner, which was building over a series of fouls throughout the match. Bremner was the chief terrier in the Leeds midfield, while Keegan was the talisman of an ever-improving cup winners Liverpool. The fight was as famous for the pair departing the pitch as the blows themselves, both players removing their shirts in protest, seemingly trying to out-posture the other. Keegan was banned for three games, Bremner eight, and both fined £500.

The result itself is almost forgotten, an early Phil Boersma goal cancelled out in the second half by Trevor Cherry, and Liverpool winning the resulting penalty shootout 6-5.

 Dirty Leeds captain on the receiving end for a change

1992 - Leeds United v Liverpool

A rematch from 18 years previously, and again it featured Leeds as champions and Liverpool as cup winners. This time however, the result was memorable for the football as opposed to the management or scuffles. The Premier League was about to bring a new era in football, and little did Liverpool fans realise that their dominance of the domestic game was dwindling hugely.

A hat-trick by Eric Cantona effectively won the game for Leeds, against a makeshift Liverpool defence including such legends as Nick Tanner, Mike Marsh and David Burrows. Cantona was on the move to Manchester United soon after, and won plenty of trophies after that. Even an own goal by Gordon Strachan couldn't change the scoreline, which ended 4-3 to Leeds.

A crowd of just 61,291 witnessed the game, which perhaps was indicative of the apathy for the tie, while there hasn't been anywhere close to seven goals in a match since.

Leeds deployed the jumping over shot technique

1998 - Arsenal v Manchester United

Arsenal came into this game as double winners, with the rule that they play the league runners-up in that case. It also happened to be their first outright victory since 1953, and looked like the balance of power was beginning to shift. United had been the dominant team since the Premier League began, but Arsene Wenger's team blew them away in 1998, and the blend of experience and youth looked invincible (it would take six years for that feat to be achieved).

Another sideshow was the return to England of David Beckham, in his first large match since his sending-off in the World Cup in France. The Arsenal fans were duly welcoming, a sign of what was to come over the next few months, as remembered here.

The game itself ended 3-0 to the Gunners, goals from Overmars, Wreh and Anelka. The teams were difficult to separate over the coming season, memorable for Man United winning the treble, but the margins were fine as they only won the league by one point (ahead of Arsenal), knocked Arsenal out of the FA Cup semi-final in an extra-time replay (THAT goal by Giggs), and won the Champions League in injury time.

Beckham was glad for the support of the Arsenal fans