Hairy balls, not crystal balls - predictions

Forgive the slightly crude reference. It is a term I have used more than once in my day job, referring to the ability to look into the future (which I don't have). But never has it been more apt than a football tournament, and this summer focusing on Euro 2012.

This week, Alan Hansen became quite the trend on Twitter for seemingly predicting that Spain, Germany, Holland and Portugal would be his top four picks for the tournament. Of course this was jumped on, and pointed out that the latter three were all in the same group. It appears that he wasn't predicting semi-finalists anyway, so the vitriol aimed in his general direction was perhaps misplaced. Hansen has made a career of sitting on the fence, and picking those nations wasn't exactly sticking his neck out - he may as well have listed all sixteen. But as he said about the recent Goat World Cup, you don't win anything with kids.

Priceless defending... oh...

I suppose there is a science to predicting football results. When I discover it, I'll be a rich man. The betting website 888 have a competition running this summer where if you were to successfully guess the outcome of all 31 matches at Euro 2012, you could win £888,888. Will certainly draw in the punters. The odds? Surely millions to one. The Premier League also has a game within the Fantasy League allowing predictions, including a 'banker' bonus. Successes? Some.

Surely the lack of predictability is why people love football. Not many people predicted Greece to win in 2004, or Denmark in 1992. The difference between a penalty missed and a penalty scored, unless it's England v Germany. It's fun to predict - yet more often than not, they go horribly wrong. There is a running joke amongst Twitter and Football365 about Mark Lawrenson's weekly forecasts and how awful they are. In all fairness, they have improved in recent years, although his favour towards Liverpool endowed them with an extra 17 points.

Six more weeks of winter

It wouldn't be a major tournament without the usual magical animal. Paul the Octopus. Punxsutawney Phil... So who will we have this year? Pavel the Polish Penguin? I'm sure something will escape from the zoo to capture the hearts and stomachs of idiots everywhere. What will it be?

The next country to leave the Euro is...

Let's just enjoy the football. Place the occasional bet. Start a fantasy football team and give up halfway through when your French defenders have surrendered and gone home. Don't make predictions. Especially when England take penalties. Keegan I'm looking at you.